everythinglost | IC Inbox

everythinglost

Call for a good time

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

everythinglost

I don't know how you see your job, do I. I can only say that I haven't seen it from temporary wardens yet.

From:

transfundere

Then that puts us into a perfect position, doesn't it?

You are my first inmate. Thus, you can shape how I see my job, with you at the very least, to be one which actually helps you as opposed to the things you've seen from other temporary wardens which have not.

So what have you got for me?

From:

everythinglost

Nothing. Luckily, I don't think psychology is required in all this, but there seems to be an amount of caring and sharing that I don't particularly care to do with a stranger who'll be gone in a month.

From:

transfundere

You think I'm going to disappear at the end of the month?

From:

everythinglost

Lets say I think you'll get a different patient.

From:

transfundere

And what does that have to do with you?

[ A soft huff. ]

I'm not interested in 'sharing and caring with a stranger', as you say. I don't think it's proper to ask that of someone, especially not in a first conversation. But is there a reason it couldn't be a first conversation, with others to follow?

From:

everythinglost

Nothing, in general.

In specific, it depends on if there's anything worth talking about.

From:

transfundere

What is it you enjoy talking about?

From:

everythinglost

Stuff. Look, there are plenty of more unnatural ways to start a conversation, but this whole set-up is still up there. Or, at least, still feels unnatural. We can just - not have a conversation. I'm sure you'll be able to figure out how you want to handle this without my help.

From:

transfundere

[ That? Actually gets a laugh out of him. But he'll shake his head.]

That sounds like an awful way to start any manner of work: just decide what ought to be done and not consult with you whatsoever.

Now, have I actually done something to offend you or are you just a deeply unsocial man?

From:

everythinglost

I believe in you.

[He shrugs.] Moderately unsociable, which means I could probably come up with a reason to be offended, but that's always seemed like too much effort.

From:

transfundere

Good. Then you'll believe me when I say that's a rubbish way to go about things.

[ A deep sigh. ]

And if you'd prefer not to talk, we certainly don't need to. Only it seems as if you've come into this convinced I'm nothing but a bother. Or worse, utterly useless. It does put me in something of a difficult position, you understand.

From:

everythinglost

Oh, well, no one's ever called me a medical man.

[He shrugs again.]

Yeah, well, I'm stuck in a very comfortable purgatory sort-of-prison and I prefer being a petty bastard to - well, lots of things, really, but definitely over making other people's positions easier. I wouldn't push you into a tiger pit, probably, but this isn't exactly the type of difficult position that moves my heart. [As is usually the case, his tone leans towards the sardonic.]

From:

transfundere

I honestly think I'd prefer the tiger pit.

[ A soft snort. ]

You find your position here comfortable? As in you'd prefer to remain here as you are and as things are? Is there some reason you didn't simply lead with that?

Edited Date: 2023-03-19 10:22 pm (UTC)

From:

everythinglost

With the tiger in it or without?

No, I find it comfortable as in not getting beaten up every day or freezing to deal while doing manual labor or getting drugged food. I'm just assuming, for that last. I've been in a lot of prisons, figure that I should be fair.

From:

transfundere

I am decidedly tiger neutral.

[ Said with a straight face. ]

Then let me pose one, potentially last question, as you are so very unsociable I doubt I will ever see you about by chance. [ Yeah, he didn't actually buy that, I hope you know. ]

Do you not want assistance, or do you merely think I cannot possibly help you?

From:

everythinglost

For shame. Don't you know there are some topics where you gotta take a stand? Or possibly a run at climbing some trees?

[He doesn't see any reason a person can't be unsociable and hang out in public spaces. It's a state of mind. Admittedly, perhaps not his, depending on the day but still a state of mind.]

I try to make assumptions, generally, but it can be difficult here, so I wouldn't want to say what you might be capable of.

From:

transfundere

Absolutely, sir. But I'd hate to stereotype the tiger, you see. If he's polite and friendly, I might quite like to be in a pit with him but if he hasn't any manners, I could certainly do without.

[ Dry as a bone. ]

Then I will assume the answer is 'assistance unwanted'. Inform me if that changes, will you?

From:

everythinglost

Considering the spikes they stick in those, if the tiger is at top manners, there's clearly something else very wrong with him.

It's the nicer assumption, so I'm glad to go with that. Enjoy your new job and so on.

From:

transfundere

Now you've added spikes. Do they put spikes in those pits? Or is that just what they show in the newspaper cartoons.

Now I feel woefully undereducated on the matter of tiger pits.

From:

everythinglost

There have always been spikes. How do you know it's a tiger pit if there aren't any spikes? It could be for anything, elsewise. A cellar people have been too lazy to get much work done on. A burrow for giant mole like aliens. A barque pit made by someone who didn't understand the assignment.

From:

transfundere

I would think 'because there is a tiger in it'.

As I'd assume that a spike pit would have spikes. Are you sure this isn't some strange modern innovation? It feels terribly modern: a tiger and spikes.

From:

everythinglost

The existence of a tiger doesn't tell you anything. If a tiger's inside your house does that make it a tiger pit?

I don't know, what year are you from?

From:

transfundere

It would certainly make the house the tiger's at that point, I should think. Though I point out it wouldn't make it a pit. Just as adding spikes to a house wouldn't make it a spike pit.

And I came from 1918, the end of the Great War.

From:

everythinglost

So you do take a stance on tigers.

Bad year. As so many of 'em are. Then I think it's probably an old invention, you just don't run in the right type of forests. Jungles. In the future there's likely someone who complains about tiger pits having spikes.